Fathers victim to court system and Parental Alienation Syndrome – PAS

Mar 05

Many fathers find themselves categorized and then victimized by the court system that is meant to protect them.  Equality is something that is simply non-existent in today’s Family Courts.  Judges, lawyer, Children’s Aid Society, Office of the Children’s Lawyer and other agencies see fathers simply as sub-standard and unable to care for their children. 

 

 

Children’s Aid Society and Durham Family Courts Label Father’s Unfit

At the same time this very same system (and organizations) recognizes the importance of having a father as an important figure in a child’s life.  This is especially true for sons who need a positive male role model.  Too often I find the double standard approach used by the Children’s Aid Society and the Oshawa Family Court’s hurts children more then helps them.  When will this broken system take a serious look at the truth about fathers?  When will they abandon the view that ALL men are fundamentally abusers and therefore unfit to parent their children.   Unfortunately I don’t see this happening in my lifetime.

Mother’s Allowed to Practice “Parental Alienation Syndrome” In Family Court

Here is a clear example of how the Family Court system in Ontario fails to protect children.  Often mother’s in particular actively practice in creating a child’s campaign of denigration against a parent, the father.  When presented in today’s courts this view is quickly shut down as some sort of aggression by the father.  When presented to the Children’s Aid Society many case workers have a look of contempt for the father that brings forward this idea.  Equally, for a man to approach reporting abuse he has suffered by a woman disbelief and miss-trust are often the response by authorities.  
 
How many men have suffered as a result of a ‘bent’ system that allows mothers to punish the father, financial and emotionally, and ignore the true needs of the children.  
 
Speak up have your say and stop this madness.
 
 
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Fathers Rights: Do fathers start off behind the eight ball?

Feb 18

The Durham Children’s Aid Society claims to have an unbiased policy where by men and women are treated equally. 

Is this true?

My experience and that of other’s I’ve talked with doesn’t paint a fair and equitable process.  DCAS is mainly run by women who often resemble a stereotypical anti-male persona.  Now is this simply a personal bias or is there some truth to this?

I would like to hear from you, male or female, to tell you story.  Share with those out here looking for insight and understanding.

Add your comments below sharing your experience with the Children’s Aid Society of Durham.

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Durham Children’s Aid Society: What the lawyers at family court said.

Jan 08

This week I had the good fortune to attend a court motion at the Oshawa Family courts (Durham Family Court 33 King Street West OSHAWA ON L1H 1A1 Phone (905) 430-5800).  I was there for yet another motion brought on by my ex who for over 5 years feels the need to continue to punish me.  While sitting there I overheard two duty council lawyers talking about the ‘System’. 

It’s so true that you always have to watch what you say because you never know who is listening.  These two lawyers who both looked seasoned enough were talking about all sorts of things.  The one thing that caught my ear was how they talked about the Durham Children’s Aid Society.  I thought being ‘in the system’ and I’m sure using this service for clients you would have an excellent view of the organization.  As they openly talked about the Durham CAS I began to wonder what was really going on.  They were talking about how the children’s aid society was over worked and under staffed.  They also talked about how Durham children’s aid society was not well equipped to really protect the children they were suppose to protect.

I learned while sitting in the court house in Oshawa just how insiders in the legal system see the DCAS( Durham Children’s Aid Society).  They were so put off by them that they were openly criticizing the competence of people within this service.  It was even said that the DCAS lawyers were reluctant to get involved when clearly it was to the benefit of the child.

Now I know this is all water cooler conversation and that these two lawyers are but a small sampling of the ‘system’.  But man did it resonate with my personal experience.  I’ve had case workers for the DCAS lie to my children, present biased material and simply go through the motions of doing a job.  When I raised the issue through the ‘complaints’ process I felt and heard the simple lack of caring. 

If you are involved with the Durham Children’s Aid Society hoping that they will protect your children take a step back.  It is easy to assume these people because they are an arm of the government that you will be taken care of.

Think first, and then think again.  The children’s aid foundation (DCAS) isn’t without bias and prejudice.  They see things through a different set of glasses, ones that surely colour you black.

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Durham Children’s Aid Society: What’s the truth?

Nov 26

 My experience with the DCAS (Durham Children’s Aid Society) has been anything but equal.  Over and over again I’ve experienced first hand case workers that place the child welfare behind personal, and I think institutional, prejudice. 

 

Case in point, during a recent interview held by a case worker my son repeatedly told her that he didn’t want phone access.  I later found out that the case worker stated to the child “…don’t lie… I know you’re lying”.  Her goal was to have him ‘change’ what he thought and bully him in to saying something else.  Later my son said to me “how many times do I have to tell her until she believes me”?  Good question, how many times does it take for an employee of the Durham Children’s (DCAS) to believe a child?

 
To answer this question you first have to take a step back, back to who I am.  Did you guess yet?  Yes I’m the father of this child, a man.  I’ve had custody of this child for 7 years after the mother abandoned him while he was in diapers.  This case is complex, lengthy and at the very least destructive to the children involved.  This child has reported to doctors, councilors and the Durham Children’s Aid Society many times of abuse he suffered by the mother and at her home.  The DCAS has refused to accept that a woman who on the outside looks nice and calm can become such a monster.  
 
Children living in Durham Region Ontario are not well protected by the system in place today.  Often as a father I am faced with that glass wall that only women can, and should, take care of kids.  How insane is this?  
 
Abuse by anyone is simply unacceptable.  A child’s welfare and safety should be considered independent of the care giver’s sex.  Profiling in this way not only hurts the children but undermines any sense of equality in our community.
 
Dad’s who have custody of there children or want more access with there child must demand more accountability from the system.  Specifically they must have and expect equal rights when working with organizations such as the Durham Children’s Aid Society.  Many good respectful fathers are demonized by bitter women who have an axe to grind.  This anger is allowed to work it’s way in to government run institutions at the very least as a sub-text to the policies and acceptable behavior allowed. 
 
As a man I know that if I ever stepped over the line, even slightly, I would be punished full hard by the system.  What training do case workers and social workers get on a regular basis to ensure they are not prejudice against men?  My guess would be next to none.
 
 
Dad’s and fathers that need help need to voice their opinion.  Start NOW and and your comment below.
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