Durham Children’s Aid Society: What’s the truth?


 My experience with the DCAS (Durham Children’s Aid Society) has been anything but equal.  Over and over again I’ve experienced first hand case workers that place the child welfare behind personal, and I think institutional, prejudice. 

 

Case in point, during a recent interview held by a case worker my son repeatedly told her that he didn’t want phone access.  I later found out that the case worker stated to the child “…don’t lie… I know you’re lying”.  Her goal was to have him ‘change’ what he thought and bully him in to saying something else.  Later my son said to me “how many times do I have to tell her until she believes me”?  Good question, how many times does it take for an employee of the Durham Children’s (DCAS) to believe a child?

 
To answer this question you first have to take a step back, back to who I am.  Did you guess yet?  Yes I’m the father of this child, a man.  I’ve had custody of this child for 7 years after the mother abandoned him while he was in diapers.  This case is complex, lengthy and at the very least destructive to the children involved.  This child has reported to doctors, councilors and the Durham Children’s Aid Society many times of abuse he suffered by the mother and at her home.  The DCAS has refused to accept that a woman who on the outside looks nice and calm can become such a monster.  
 
Children living in Durham Region Ontario are not well protected by the system in place today.  Often as a father I am faced with that glass wall that only women can, and should, take care of kids.  How insane is this?  
 
Abuse by anyone is simply unacceptable.  A child’s welfare and safety should be considered independent of the care giver’s sex.  Profiling in this way not only hurts the children but undermines any sense of equality in our community.
 
Dad’s who have custody of there children or want more access with there child must demand more accountability from the system.  Specifically they must have and expect equal rights when working with organizations such as the Durham Children’s Aid Society.  Many good respectful fathers are demonized by bitter women who have an axe to grind.  This anger is allowed to work it’s way in to government run institutions at the very least as a sub-text to the policies and acceptable behavior allowed. 
 
As a man I know that if I ever stepped over the line, even slightly, I would be punished full hard by the system.  What training do case workers and social workers get on a regular basis to ensure they are not prejudice against men?  My guess would be next to none.
 
 
Dad’s and fathers that need help need to voice their opinion.  Start NOW and and your comment below.

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20 Comments

  • John Doe
    November 28, 2009 at 3:14 pm

    I totally agree!

    Men area always held accountable for ‘THOSE’ who are abusers. When is the SYSTEM going to see that abuse is the same from a man as from a woman… it’s just wrong…

    It’s time men stood up to the feminist run system we have.

  • PapaBear
    February 17, 2010 at 5:17 pm

    Glad to be here… What is the definition of “AID”?…
    I am presently dealing with DCAS and they have done nothing to aid, help, or resolve any issues within my family. They have only caused extream grief as well as tremendous instibility for myself, my partner as well as my 15 month old daughter and and five year old son. Not to mention on Febuary 16th 2010 at approxamently 3:30 pm the death of my three and a half month old unborn child at the Morgantaller Clinic in Toronto. Due to stipulations, embargos, and down right unrealistic expectations from DCAS, my partner felt as though she had no choice but to abord our unborn child. I am presently preparing a presentation, as well as a press release in which my DCAS file will be open to the public for anyone and everyone who is interested to see. At which time I will guarentee public opinion will be extreamly in the favor of my family as well as the returning of my 15 month old daughter and 5 year old son… I am also activly persuing representation to file a multi million dollar lawsuit against DCAS. I am sick of trying to reason with these people’
    ( most of whom are young woman and men who do not have children of their own)
    And having my words, stories, and confessions misconstrude, twisted and just plain fabricated to insure the security of my families DCAS file! If you are interested in my story and would like more information please stay tuned to this web site as I will now be presenting a daily fourm for all interested parties. I refuse to let DCAS ruin the life of my children as well as my family and I have taken an oath to fight back and let the public know where and how their tax dollars are being spent. As well as why DCAS is so far over budget they can not provide the proper care to children and families who really need there help. I just wonder why everytime I pick up the durham newspaper I have to read a story about how some child was murdered, how some children were molested in durham region, how DCAS had a flaw in their hiring process, when they hired Doctors to determin the fate of young children and it turned out that they doctors they hired were not even qualified doctors. How DCAS is so short on their budget. Where is this money going? why are Children in need of this service not being provided for? and why are some families who have minor marital or relationship issues being subjected to this extreme scrutny when their children have never been in harms way. It literilly makes me nausous. Please stay tuned unto this site on a daily basis as I will be exposing many faults and F*$k ups at the hands of DCAS, The people we rely on to protect our children, our future!
    Sincerly
    PAPA BEAR!

  • A past Society's child
    July 22, 2010 at 7:32 pm

    They will let the abuser have contact with the child even if you or the abuser can prove they are abusive. I know this for a fact. It doesnt matter if you as father was abuser or her as in mom was abuser. It doesnt matter, all in all they will give the child access to the abuser, supervised and eventually un-supervised and in this case if she can woo them then maybe she will get over night visits at her home behind closed doors. At the same time she could be good in first place your bad *just saying for sake of example. And they take your child(ren) away from both of you. Give you relatively the same rights. I am past society’s child. I had suffered abuse in foster home. I have known many kids that were killed off after which they speak ill about the society. Been there seen it! Been there spoke about it to workers I had at time. Was informed that I was to kill myself, they knew of a place where no one would care if I ended my life. And they want this for “best interest of society” Ever since then my other family members have been targeted by them. I ended up having a happy healthy cute child. He got tortured by them, taken, massively burned they covered their tracks. They hide it from me, I was the one to notice then squawk like a parrot. To every one and everything I could find. My lawyer stuck her nose in to help me, after seeing the pictures I took. I bought a digital camera about 1 or 2 months before my son’s birth and it’s helped me prove that it’s worth the money ever since. Dollars stores are great places to get documenting your horrid memories of society on paper. In otherwords do something have your child equipt with a device that shows the visit. DOnt let anyone know it’s there! Have a pad of paper and a pen or pencil handy to document what is going on. Have the child either tell you how they feel you write it down but better is the child writes. Everyday of life til the end of visits, have him write like a journal. I know many dont want that constant reminder but sometimes that comes in handy when stuff starts happening again. My son came from my home where he was well cared for well educated, well loved. And well protected away from his abusive deranged father. To going into the society where they took my happy lil man and turned him into an uncontrollable mess. He was healthy then turned deathly ill shortly after going into fostercare. His visits were constantly missed due to his constant hospital stays where he was left there barely breathing close to death. Definition of AID is simple to help in the matter or issue that is existing. Well they are only aided by others in aiding their wallet with cash. This was organization that is far from organized, started quite awhile back. Might of been good years before my time I dont know. During my life it hasnt proved any bit helpful. Kids taken from good home to be put in either good homes or homes that make the kids suicidal due to unfair treatment, unfair abuse, unfair rules, treated like scum because they are just simply the BAD KIDs due to them NEEDING assistance. The more you involve CAS or in your case DCAS the more crap that will be thrown back in your face in court cases to come. People in the dark think well if child is taken then automatically there is good reason to take. Yes good enough for worker, they line their wallet and make more money when they have a child on their case load and even more when the child is placed in their care, all thanks to your tax dollars. Yes your tax dollars. With no say we blindly aid the workers and all their staff above them. And for what? I know so many crackhead mom;s and crack head dads that still have their kids. But then again they have an expensive vehicle, or expensive house that makes they worth the world, and is considered untouchable. Abuse is abuse no matter how much or how little one has in their wallet. But then again it doesn’t matter the system is built that way unfortunately. I am a woman as im sure you could get from what i said. But I do understand what it feels like to have an unworthly parent having access. My son’s dad is a drug abuser that spends alot of afternoon into early morning getting drunk doing drugs and getting some other dude to drug his girlfriends. so yet he has more kids and more power. He beats anyone and anything that cries I should know. He slices people up just simplely because these people are dare talking to his people. I had enough repressed memories to get a restraining order against him. He gets visits and sooner or later he’ll get unsupervised visits. He’ll have the ability to walk off with my child, go to a drug house possibly drug my son or get him killed in the mean time before they find and get my son back. I know this might seem pointless im just telling you what i know. I know to much therefore I get to pay for the rest of my life, and since I know then they think my son is worth the same treatment. I had to get my son to talk again and it only seemed to happen about a week or two after he was replaced with me. He told me in a chilly heart breaking voice about how hot light bulb burns arm LIGHT BULB HURT ARM!!! LIGHT BURNS ARM… he had a burn on his arm that was covered up as being from tea must of been round tea. then it’s teapot then it’s tea bag. It was in the size of a regular non-flourscent light bulb. the degrees of burns corresponded the same as a light bulb and the inwardness was lesser degree burn. The burn wasnt treated right in the beginning, and was cared for during his time in foster care.

  • A past Society's child
    July 22, 2010 at 7:50 pm

    Ok i looked up Durham and found out I was right it is ontario. I have people that are looking to rally against CAS/FACS etc. We can have all the money in the world but we need the numbers on our side to hopefully sway government and shed light. I just read the post from Papa bear. Im sorry for your loss, I almost had a second loss in the hands of Society. My first loss was from the abuse from the dad of this child. Second one I didnt give the dad a chance to abort this one on me. But facs took my child which gave him a sense of not wanting to hold onto life. in December close to Christmas my son almost passed on to the otherside. At which time they finially gave me the ability to visit him in the hospital which perked up his hope

  • Ashley KInney
    August 26, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    My name is ashley,
    im 16 years old.
    D/CAS has been involved in my life since i was an infint.
    Im tryin to go on the program called ECM – extended care Maitnece.
    I see tonz of girls my age going on it, but my worker is not allowing it. My family is now apart of my life, but they can not support me finacially. Does anyone have any sugestions, or thoughts.
    i need help

  • Jules
    January 26, 2011 at 2:41 pm

    I am living a horrible experience with peel children’s aid, since my daughter is 2.5 years old and has only given disclosure to me her mom, its just never enough. Even though she has said enough to me, the two visits with children’s aid worker were horrible. the first my daughter did not speak to her at all. Well the worker had a face ! OMG pretty scary, she was extremely cold and I don’t even know if this 27 year old female has been working there long, or if she even has teeth, that’s how un friendly she was to my 2.5 year old daughter. They also brought in an interpreter who looked like santa claus from a scary movie. Second visit my daughter disclose some stuff BUT OF coarse NOT ENOUGH. Because I took her to see two doctors to be examined, and I took her to see a psychotherapist to help with disclosure, then one last attempt I took her to The Special Victims unit hoping that she would disclose. Which she didn’t. Children’s aid worker is now threatening me to take my daughter away from me and hand her right to her father who is the molester. she says that she feels I’m giving her too much emotional distress by putting her through such interviews.. Absolutely not acceptable, she even said at the end of the day its my call as her mother but that i should let them know. WHICH I did, but no she now wants to have a saying on my daughters everything. she has even told me that she advised the father that even though our daughter runs away from him on his access day, kicks and screams, cries her eyes out, he still has the right to take her for the visit against her will. HOW is this healthy for a child ? how could this be advised by CAS ?
    I am beyond disappointed in the system.. My lawyer has advised me that I have the right to say that he should not take her under those conditions and just close the door, but I feel its going to work against me if I keep trying to protect her. my hands are tied, and its such an extreme disappointment and scary thought to know that I can not protect my daughter.

    If you have any advise that could help me please let me know..
    jules0123@live.com

  • Terry
    January 26, 2011 at 3:02 pm

    Jules it’s always hard when your children are being hurt.

    Always question your lawyer and make sure he is really working for what you want and not just taking your money. Make sure that you are getting answers from Children’s Aid. If not talk to the supervisor and keep applying pressure.

    Don’t be afraid of the courts Family Law Judges will do what they want regardless. Fight hard for what is right and always stop to make sure you’re fighting the right thing.

    Good luck

  • Jules
    March 2, 2011 at 8:11 am

    Thank you, to be honest i am very scare to lose my daughter CAS has scared me to point of no return i truly feel. They have turned the story around on me. They want me to look at everything my child has disclosed on a positive note and not a sexual one. How could i when that is what the child us saying? My heart could not be in any more pieces, my life in any more distress. To top it off i can not find a good lawyer in legal aid, at this point i prefer a women lawyer. What is a parent to do in this circumnstance, i feel scared and i feel threaten i feel i need to stay quiet. I hope i have the strength to keep fighting.
    Why is it that CAS has such bad reputation and yet so much power in our lifes.
    Jules0123@live.com

  • marie ann
    April 20, 2011 at 4:11 pm

    I agree with most of the above I am a mother who has custody of my 3 children I live in a co-op and constatly see mothers who only allow fathers assess if the father gives the mother child support mean while the mother blow the money on themselves. I support fathers they are not treated equally just because some mothers have custody does not give them the right to ruin a father child relationship by bribery and manipulation

  • Steve
    July 11, 2011 at 7:19 am

    Be apart of our facebook group: ”STOP THE CHILDREN’S AID SOCIETY FROM TAKING CHILDREN FROM GOOD PARENTS” We are child advocates and knowledged parents. ( Great place to get info and advice ).

  • KENNETH
    November 7, 2011 at 9:35 am

    It took me 6 years to save my boys from harm working with dcas ,they finally took my boys from her care and started with there witch hunt against me …..I have found Oshawa to be the most crooked area, I have been in in Ontario …..my boys have been in care for 19 months now and still not crowned ward children ….they have tasked me from pee tests to parenting councelling to police reports and on and on they finally had me meeting assement Dr. who has found me angry with the system with in a three hour period and now finally trying to get crown wardship …..They are making stories up on my children and they want to speak to the judge ,no one wants to listen to them …..I have tons of reports on DCAS abusing my boys ,the workers there are not registered to the college of social workers ….my lawyer was a dump truck that took the money and ran it all out .I am heading to pre trial in dec.21st with out a lawyer now ….I spent 17 thousand seeing my boys for 28 hours in dcas office this year ….I hate Oshawa and all the criminals workers there ….If this judge stamps this order I will APPEAL IT …..THEY DONE EVEN HAVE CONSENT TO DRUG MY YOUNGER LAD AND THEY BRAINWASH THE CHILDREN THERE LIKE MAD ….I WILL NOT QUIT ..

  • Frank
    December 1, 2012 at 7:47 am

    The durham CAS is bad. try not to get rapped up with them. their are a few workers that will coax a kid on what to say.and I know this first hand because one of my kids were in CAS and the foster father and mother told me they caught the worker doing this,and phoned to have her removed from the case,meanless to say I did not find this out till after the fact I lost my daughter to CAS,their are some good workers their but their are a few that disgustd me.and trust me these workers that made me lose my kid, you know saying Karma will get you. well trust me I wont rest till that day comes.if anyone wants to know which worker to watch out for send me email,payback is a bitch when you fool around with someones kids to make them lose them. email me at bigdaddy4792@hotmail.com

  • Canada Court Watch
    February 8, 2013 at 4:54 pm

    Canada Court Watch is interested in hearing from anyone who has has a bad experience with workers at the Durham CAS or any other CAS and who is willing to come forth to testify. Parents and kids in care or formerly in care are welcome. Please contact us at info@canadacourtwatch.com

    We also encourage all those with experiences with CAS to register at http://www.crpa.ca and to enter the names of CAS workers into the public database.

  • Brenda
    February 15, 2013 at 4:32 pm

    I don’t want to say to much about my situation only that I do agree that the CAS workers are biased against men. My worker when she needs to contact my husband and I about something she always calls me she will not talk to my husband over the phone unless I have put him on the phone. The 1st time we met our worker she listen to what everyone else had to say but my husband was trying to say something and I had to interupt her to say “excuse me but my husband was trying to say something. Also they have been trying to break us up. I have been with my husband for almost 9 years and we are in a good relationship. So it’s not just father’s who are trying to fight their spouse in a custody battle it is all men in general. They try to devide and conquor. Anyway I just thought I would comment on that.

  • Lan
    February 28, 2013 at 6:11 am

    Durham CAS is very bad, they are crooked. Pls read this story was happened last year… Durham CAS is a big liar.

    http://www.durhamregion.com/iphone/news/article/1546092–naked-truth-bowmanville-nudists-angry-over-how-children-s-aid-questioned-their-daughter

  • Lan
    February 28, 2013 at 6:19 am

    Steve:
    July 11, 2011 at 7:19 am
    Be apart of our facebook group: ”STOP THE CHILDREN’S AID SOCIETY FROM TAKING CHILDREN FROM GOOD PARENTS” We are child advocates and knowledged parents. ( Great place to get info and advice ).

    Hi, Steve, what is your facebook name call? We are the one of knoeledged parents, like to help out and give info and advice. Thanks

  • mikee
    December 30, 2014 at 5:36 pm

    Let me tell u I’m living it now, after 21 yrs of marriage my wife decided she had enough, while I was out west working, when I got back we got into a fight I got charged and restricted from my house and any where she could be, that includes daycare schools of my kids, have had meeting with Durham cas which the first worker had me in a interrogation type room and grilled me for 10min, told me I’m required to sign a contract, further more anything I said about my wife lifestyle, drug use, child abandonment meant nothing to her, even after all this which my now ex is required to sign a contract also and do drug testing, nothing has been done about it, my kids tell me that when they do show up the question are about how’s school what gifts you want for Xmass etc, not anything to do with their living conditions, my 20 yr old daughter even went so far as to tell them her history and that the kids should be with me!! Cas then offered to pay her to babysit while her mom goes out!!! I was in court when I met a young woman, she was there for assault, in talking to her she stated she had her kids and an apartment getting assistance, even with the assault charge, and plainly told me, your screwed!! Why? Your a man!! So here I am, no job, with a charge sleeping on a couch, can’t see my kids, can’t contact their mom, so the system is biased as per the young lady in court! Further more cas has Been advising mt ex in hodw to get me to pay child support! Nothing about the 500gs house I baught the vehicles etc, I’m the bad guy so it just easier to persecute me! So yes I find Durham cas bias and unfair and a bunch of high paid liars who takes the easy way to get paid!!!

  • mikee
    December 30, 2014 at 5:59 pm

    Oh I should tell you, Durham cas requested names and numbers for ppl who have been around the kids and could give further info on their welfare, as of Sept 2014 non have been called and when a cpl did call no follow up calls where made back

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